Alysa thinks….

Alysa thinks that I am strict with my rules.  Ha!  I actually laughed at her when she said this.  She thinks that 8:00 pm for the phone to be put away is stupid.  She thinks that she should be able to have her phone longer.  She thinks that she is entitled to her phone.  It is amazing. 

Last night we were driving home from the church, it was 8:05 p.m.  I asked her to wrap up her conversation with whomever she was texting and put her phone away when we got home.  She agreed. 

Then at about 8:30 p.m I heard music coming from her room.   I asked her why she was still on her phone and that it was supposed to be put away.   She said she was using it as a “calculator and to listen to her music”.  I told her she had an iPod and a calculator and she could use those.  She said that she didn’t know how to use her calculator.   I told her that she should figure it out and she needed to put away her phone and she needed to ask for permission before she used her phone past 8:00 p.m. for anything.  

Then at about 9:15 p.m. I heard music coming from the bathroom while she was showering.   When she got out I asked her why she had her phone again. She said that she always uses it when she showers to listen to music. 

I talked to her and told her that I was really considering taking her phone away for the whole next day, because it was annoying that I had to ask her so many times.   She freaked out and told me that I was being ridiculous and that she didn’t think she did anything bad.  I told her I was sorry, but when I asked her to put the phone away, then she got it again 2 times, it was annoying and breaking the rules.   We went through her texts and while she was “using her phone as a calculator and listening to her music” she had texted 4 different people.   Hummm.   I asked her why she didn’t tell me and she said that she wasn’t texting at the minute I asked her.   Lame.  Little white lie!   Lie by omission, whatever you want to call it. 

We talked about the rules and that her phone wasn’t something that I really cared if she had or not and she better follow the rules because it was just easy for me to disconnect it and move on.   She was mad and told me that my rules were strict and her friends didn’t have THESE rules.  I told her that I didn’t care what her friends rules were and that I didn’t want her to have her phone even as long as she does.  We figured out the hours she had her phone and then 8:00 p.m didn’t seem so stupid.  We made a deal that she would not have her phone during the morning and she had to turn it in at 7:00 pm and then she could take it to school.   We also made a deal that if she could strictly obey the rules for 2 weeks, then her time could be moved to 8:30 p and if she could follow the rules after that until Thanksgiving, then it would be moved to 9:00 p.m.  This is all the time that she gets.    The phone is a evil addiction and my advice to other parents with a 13 year old is to wait as long as you can to get them a phone!  Max will be sad, but he is not getting a phone for as long as I can go. 

The next morning, she counted down the minutes that she could have it back.  I thought it was lame.    

We are working on some additional super strict rules (ie - no FaceTime in your room).  I secretly love making Alysa mad at the rules and I am glad that she thinks they are SUPER STRICT.   Ha.